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The Award for BU goes to...
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Oral Roberts University: the best school in the universe.
An argument, however logical, is inherently biased when the subject
is one's alma mater, but the fact is, ORU IS the best university
in the world. Fortunately, I am happy to announce that this essay
is completely unbiased. I don't know how I do it but I, like the
networks before me, am a bastion of impartiality. If you don't believe
me just call and ask.
Now, as to the who, what, when and how's of ORU's acquisition
of the award for best university (BU) in the world (why be modest?)
... in the universe.
So that there is no confusion the rules for determining best university
will be clearly stated.
But first we (the editors of The Communique) did not determine
the best university by solely calculating endowments, student /
teacher ratio, entrance or exit test scores, or affordability. Nor
did we use the oldest sign of wealth known to academia - the amount
of golden buildings on campus. Now, if we had, ORU would still have
done well. As a matter of fact US News rated ORU in the first tier
for private schools in the Midwest in its Spring College Special
issue.
Enough PR and CW (Conventional Wisdom). Post it as you may, ORU
would still rank highly and in the years to come ORU will continue
to rise in regard and academic excellence.
Like the four dots (see illustration) that must be connected with
two straight lines without lifting the pencil, the award for the
real BU cannot be determined unless one takes a step back and views
the big picture.
First, the BU must be a place that trains people to impact and
change the world in practical ways. While studying theories and
mulling over abstractions may stimulate many academics (sounds like
a kind of nut if you think about it) its sum is mere intellectual
snobbery unless it translates into action.
Secondly, this action must be positive in nature. No one will
debate the influence of Marxist thought upon our world, but saying
that it has been positive is a reach. It also helps the case of
the BU contestant if this positive action has long term, dare I
say, eternal benefits.
Yes, I dare.
Now the definition of eternal benefits is what will most likely
cause division among logisticians like myself (I love titles one
can just confer upon oneself- I have a lot of them). It also helps
if you approach life with a Judeo-Christian worldview, but this
is not a requirement. Even an atheist can acknowledge the benefits
bestowed by true Judeo-Christianity (more than any other philosophy)
upon Western Civilization. If one doubts that Western Civilization
is the most humane and decent of all societies to date, then one
can purchase a ticket and visit Western Civ's competition in the
Middle East and Asia, where billions are enslaved to gangrenous
belief systems.
I could argue the need for a Judeo-Christian background in the
BU contestant further, but I shall assume that since we are all
alumni we have recognized the importance of a Christian university.
However, if one is questioning please contact me at ppfanstiel@excite.com
and I will be glad to send you copies of all my Humanities syntheses.
If you still aren't convinced contact me again and we'll talk (meanwhile,
pass the syntheses on to a friend who has insomnia).
Now if there is something to this Christianity, and there is a
power in the truth that Jesus spoke 2000 years ago, then only universities
that recognized this truth would be left in our search.
Since Jesus talked about his death, and resurrection only those
schools that believe in this documented event could survive elimination.
And since Jesus also spoke about the gift of the Holy Spirit, only
universities that are open to all of what Jesus said and seek to
understand it, would be left.
It is at this point that we add all of the other factors that
go into the BU, such as academics, ratios, cost, sports, etc. For
logic would call those who profess Christ and yet sit idly on their
laurels cop-outs. I would call them other things, but this is a
family newsletter.
To state the algorithm sequentially.
The BU must train its students to make an eternal positive impact.
It must have a Christian heritage. It must be a Christian institution
that believes Jesus and in Jesus and trains its students accordingly.
It must also be sound in practical academic fields.
If, at this point, there are any schools left with ORU for the
award of BU in the universe, then we must employ the time tested
tie-breaker: golden buildings.
Cut & Paste: The next issue of The Communique will feature
the talented Amber Warner as editor. Philip will be moving on to
other pastures. Most notably those pastures in Virginia.
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